Kikumaru-kun and I are currently engaged in a battle royale. Over what, you may or may not want to know.
Kikumaru feels that she has as much right to use the kitchen table for what ever she pleases, as any other human laying about might. I (often) beg to differ.
But moving on, picking her up and putting her back on the floor, fussing at her, shaking a soda can that contained dried beans and squirting water at her have all failed as useful deterrents in her quest to claim the kitchen tabletop as her very own domain. At best, all I get for my extreme efforts are a bland look, or, if she’s feeling particularly spunky, a yawn.
My most recent answer to her perpetual bad behavior, (as she was stepping on to the table, obviously not the least bit concerned that I was sitting right there, reading the latest yaoi daily smut) was the very mature act of sticking out my tongue and muttering, “Thu thingk thu tho thmart, thu big thum that. Nyaa,” which roughly translates to, “You think you’re so smart, you big dumb cat. Nyaa.”
This, apparently, frightened her so terribly that not only did she almost hurt herself in her haste to not only get off the table but also out of the kitchen entirely, she has not even attempted to get on the table since, regardless of whether or not I am actually in the room. Score one for the big, dumb (lowly) human. Never mind, it has sent my self-image spiraling into despair.
Now if only I could figure how to keep them both out of my tea...