January 2nd, 2005

daisuke and ken

Jack the Ripper? Perhaps. Hitler? Maybe.

I turned my cell phone on this morning only to realize that I had missed six calls from AnhMai, all within the last 24 hours.

Of course my first (rational) thought was: Oh God. Someone’s died.

Naturally, it wasn’t anything so important.

“You have a cordless keyboard and mouse, don’t you?” Mai half stated, half asked after I had frantically dialed her back.

“Eh?” I was still working under the assumption that death had taken someone near and dear to my heart (or at the very least—someone was barely clinging to life in a taupe colored hospital room).

“Why you insist on—“ Mai muttered menacingly, “Key-Board!” she insists on over pronouncing words when she is frustrated, “Mouse! Wireless! Yes?”

Of course at this point, I was even more confused and desperately trying to rewind the conversation in my head so that I might have a snowball’s chance of figuring out what it was that she was asking me. Nigh cowering in fear I offered up the one answer that tends to placate her, regardless of the question, “Yes?”

“Yes,” she seemed much calmer now that she had an answer to her original question, “How often did you change the batteries?”

Okay, for the people who do not make a regular point of digging though my garbage and/or acting in other stalkerish ways: I once had a wireless keyboard/mouse. Once. As in it’s been a while, and I don’t have one anymore.

Not putting any particular thought into my answer, I responded, “Whenever they ran out.” As you might imagine, this was not the correct answer.

“And how often was that?” Even though the static-ridden cellular line I could swear I heard her grinding her teeth.

“Um,” the fact that there were hundreds of miles between us could not stop the mortal fear I had of an angry Mai from chilling me to the bone, “Not often…” I stalled, desperately trying to remember, “More often for the mouse…Maybe every two or three months?” Honestly, I couldn’t really remember.

“Oh! Okay!” And suddenly, everything was right with the world. AnhMai was satisfied. “I guess I’ll talk to you later.” She hung up and I was left staring at my phone in both disbelief and relief.

I have to admit, the entire exchange couldn't have lasted more than 5 minutes but it left me exhausted.

What horror could I have possibly committed in a past life to deserve this kind of punishment? Eh?

I need a nap.


You're the smirk,a frown-smile hybrid that's a little bit cocky and usually associated with
evil or arrogant,but attractive people.You probably just don't give a damn,but it's
everyone else's fault if you don't because you're too awesome to have any real faults.

What Kind of Smile are You?
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