**Note how I have used the past tense in the previous sentence.**
Yes. I am now officially sick. Strep throat. Lovely. :)
I’m really not the best patient, but I’ll try to be good, and I really do have the best intentions. However, I received this call earlier from the so-called friend who was so kind as to pass this bug to me, and have since had a difficult time sticking to my plan.
Caller: Hey, are you feeling okay? Your voice sounds kind of rough.
Me: I’ve got strep.
Caller: Really? I didn’t give it to you did I? ‘Cause I’d feel really bad if you caught it from me.
See, I have issues. I tend to say exactly what I’m thinking, and often very sarcastically. And when the person who used me as a pillow, used my pillow and just made a general and all too present nuisance of herself before bothering to inform me that she had contracted strep throat asks if I got it from her, I really, really, really want to go, “DUH!”
But I did not.
I am trying.
Me: No, no. Of course not!
Caller: Good. You’ve got to be really careful. That’s been going around.
I’ve run into a bit of a problem. I was raised in a “good” catholic environment, and as such had come to several conclusions that were just TRUE. But lately, these conclusions have come under attack from none other than my very own brain.
How can the brain disagree with itself? A very perplexing idea all it’s own, but not my point. :)
You see, I was watching 7th Heaven, (What?! I’m sick! Those sort of mommy-dearest shows appeal to the sick!) and on the show two of the little brats (See? I insulted them, too!) were going about to various houses of worship in an ill-considered quest to seek redemption for a perceived sin and thus avoid H-E-double-hockey-sticks.
That got me thinking about hell, and it’s foil, heaven, and just what I thought of them and I came to the shocking conclusion that I don’t.
I could not bring myself to believe that they exist. The time lines are just too messed up, even for someone on some all-powerful power trip. Compare the human lifespan with eternity and its nonexistent. Not even a second or a flash or a twinkle in some deity’s eye.
So, what then, would be the point of basing the rest of ones theoretical existence on something so irrelevant? How can something so insignificant decide something so important? If there is a god, I can only hope he/she/it’s brighter than that!
To punish or reward based on such a small amount of evidence of true nature just seems wrong.
Besides that, what would you do all day in heaven for eternity? That’s a long time folks. One can only sing with choirs of angels for so long. :p
But like I said, I’m in a funk. And if there is a hell, I’ve no doubt bought my ticket for that hand-basket of doom. So I guess there is not really any point of dwelling on it as either way (I burn in hell or just cease to exist), whatever comes next had better not be any more interesting than what I’ve got sitting on my lap now.
Dear God In Heaven Above.
Quote of the day: You are not a sinner if you know that you've sinned. ~Washi from Haibane Renmai